Why Your Handwriting Matters

Pen or pencil, crayon or quill. In a notebook, on a scrap of paper, in a letter, on a postcard or the back of your hand. It’s not what you use that matters, it’s the fact that you are writing it down by hand.

A recent study by the Norwegian University of Science and Technology confirms that writing by hand activates more areas of the brain that typing on a keyboard. It’s not the first study to do this and it certainly won’t be the last. My own research and experience running writing workshops and retreats, using only notebook and pen, over the the last 12 years has provided ample evidence for me. The transformative power of writing down our life and sharing our stories is phenomenal and fun. We can all do it. Without the pressure of ‘proper’ spelling, correct punctuation or grammatical rules and regs that were drilled into us when we were children we are free to experiment and play.

Recently someone contacted me to ask if my Zoom writing workshops would be suitable for her, ‘as l developed a fear of writing from a Womens studies course I was on. My generation write differently apparently and it's the wrong way!’ I assured her that on my workshops there is no such thing as the ‘wrong way’.

On BBC Radio 4 Point of View Professor Tom Shakespeare, sociologist and bioethicist, talks about the importance of handwriting, his concern that his handwriting has ‘gone to pot’ and his determination to do something about it. Do listen to this podcast.

Writing by hand is creative, liberating and available to everyone. It’s our identity and when people comment, ‘Oh, my handwriting’s terrible,’ I respond with, ’No, your handwriting is unique and worth preserving.’ By hand you can send a love letter in the post, a birthday card to a treasured a family member, a thank you for a wonderful evening with dear friends. It is in every sense of the word, our signature.

Join me on Zoom on Wednesdays at 1pm & 7pm London time for creative writing for wellbeing workshops and in Andalucia this year for writing, walking and meditation retreats.

Follow me on Instagram or Facebook

Zoom Writing & Meditation Workshops - How To Join Me

A belated and very happy new year to you all - may it bring peace, health and creativity to you all.

Finally, I can plan ahead long enough to welcome you all back to my online writing workshops, for a couple of months at least.

Apologies for the delay, it's been too long.

Payment will be by donation to allow everyone, irrespective of financial status, to benefit from the joy of slowing down and discovering the power of writing down their lives on paper. To experience the delight of sharing a confidential, creative space and perhaps, see again familiar faces. I've missed you all!

Your diary, your life matters as much as any other and spelling, punctuation, grammar - none of this as much as writing honestly, as putting your heart on the page.

Reflecting back in days, months, years to come we will discover how we got through these tumultuous times. We must leave a record so future generations can truly understand what it was like for every single one of us, whoever we are, where ever we live.

All I ask is that pay what you can afford (these workshops are usually £20) and turn up with some paper, a pen or pencil and an inquisitive mind. No need to share your writing and you can write in what ever language you prefer.

No previous writing experience needed.

There will be later dates and will post about them as soon as I can confirm. Do follow me on Instagram @elainekingett or Facebook @elainekingett.

 

 Zoom Writing & Meditation Workshops 

Every Wednesday January 18th –Wednesday February 22nd

Morning: 10.30am - 11.30am London Time
Meeting ID: 881 0631 5581
Passcode: 038473


Evening: 7pm- 8pm London Time
Meeting ID: 867 0062 5731
Passcode: 734468

Please donate before the workshop to join me:

Bank transfer:
Account name: Elaine Kingett
Account number: 89496685
Sort Code: 09 01 33

PayPal:
https://paypal.me/elainekingett?locale.x=en_GB 


Thank you!
 

See what other writers say:

‘The sessions have been surprising, enlightening, entertaining, challenging. thoughtful, respectful and made me think about my motivations, experiences and what has made me who and what I am.’

 ‘Thanks again for such thought provoking and comfortable, well crafted sessions.'

 ‘Thanks again for this morning’s session. I felt emotional at the start and the only way I can describe it is like being hugged.’

 ‘I’m writing this straight from my first writing workshop with you and I want to let you know what a special hour this has been for me. I’ve been lurking in the shadows too long!’

 ‘Thank you so much for this morning. It was really good and provided some really valuable focus for writing and being able to get the words to flow onto the paper in a way that felt natural. I will definitely join in the future and am blocking out the space in my calendar right now.’

 ‘I really love how you guide the sessions and since I’ve been in my first session, I feel much more confident with my flaws and could start to break bad habits and blockades.’

Do email me if you have any questions about these workshops or about my retreats this summer

May 2020 Newsletter Where I am – and how we can be together

Where I am – and how we can be together

I have started this newsletter many times, eager to be in touch with my sprawling web of writing friends across the globe. But half way through compiling each new draft, something new invariably arises to throw our lives into disarray again.

For some it is an incredibly difficult time. On my part, I am still planning to sell my London flat and move to Seville for an Andalucian adventure before I decide where to settle, but in the current situation, and with Brexit lurking, when that will be (and if it will be possible at all) no one knows. 

Luckily, some positive signs are appearing. Airlines have announced plans to resume flights from the UK to Spain in June and estate agents have opened – and golf clubs and garden centres... the lack of compost and spring bedding has been particularly worrying, I must admit! But I am lucky, I have balconies that catch the sun (see pic), supportive children and wonderful neighbours, and I'm running workshops for a wider audience than ever before.

Writing & Meditation Workshops now on Zoom

Photo thanks to Annie Manson. Annie runs highly recommended Spanish food and wine tours in Andalucia Find more info here: https://www.anniebspain.com/

For years, people all over the world have been asking me if I could run my writing workshops online, but, admittedly, the fear of technology (and having to look at myself while teaching!) had stopped me. Now, my hand forced by quarantine, I am so glad I have! Although it's costing me a fortune in Bobbi Brown foundation and Touche Eclat.

What has delighted me most is that the workshops still have the same therapeutic impact online. Keeping a notebook or a diary, and using pen and paper to write down our lives is something we all should be doing right now… to aid our own mental health and for future generations to understand how it is for us all, living in the now. Hosting the workshops has also encouraged me to put on proper clothes and not just live in ‘daytime pyjamas’!

Email me at elaine@write-it-down.co.uk for details.

Here are a couple of responses from people who have joined recently

'I wrestled through the class then that last question came in like a curve ball and truths appeared before my eyes that were profound! What journeys we take in the corners of our spare rooms, wedged where there is WiFi!'

'I really enjoyed the workshop this past week. I surprised myself by how much I was able to write! You are an excellent facilitator.'

Private Groups
As well as public sessions, I am also running two-hour workshops for private groups of up to 6–8 participants. Currently this includes people in Australia, Spain, France, New Zealand and the UK – both those who have been on my retreats, some old friends who were once part of my very first Mums &  Babies group, and new attendees. This arrangement allows more time to share your writing in a mutually supportive and non-critical environment. Do get in touch if you would like to arrange a private class.

In other news…

In April, I was thrilled to be be invited back by the long-established British clothing and homeware brand TOAST to run mindful creative writing workshops for a third year. This year, more than 150 writers from all over the world joined me for three Zoom workshops as part of TOAST's 'Living Lines' concept, the philosophy behind  their SS20 collection.

It was a rewarding opportunity to meet so many new faces and spread the word about the empowerment benefits of writing, especially in this fast-changing and sometimes  frightening world. I so am grateful for the many comments of thanks and appreciation that I received.

This poem felt apt to include in those workshops, as it does to share it again here.

The Way It Is

There’s a thread you follow. It goes among
things that change. But it doesn’t change.
People wonder about what you are pursuing.
You have to explain about the thread.
But it is hard for others to see.
While you hold it you can’t get lost.
Tragedies happen; people get hurt
or die; and you suffer and get old.
Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
You don’t ever let go of the thread.

William Stafford

Wishing you all a safe journey through the next few months

NEW: Zoom Writing & Meditation Workshops

Thanks to Annie Manson for the photo and testimonial - a passionate advocate for Spanish gastronomy she runs fabulous food and sherry holidays in Vejer, Andalucia - great fun, I loved it! https://www.anniebspain.com/

Writing workshops: For years, people all over the world have been asking me if I could run my writing workshops online, but the fear of technology and vanity about my own appearance on screen had stopped me. I’d never even done Facetime. Now, because of quarantine, I am so glad I have!
.
What has surprised me most is that the workshops still seem to have the same therapeutic impact online. Writing down our lives, keeping a notebook or a diary using pen and paper is something we all should be doing… for our own mental health and for future generations to understand how it is for us all, living in the now. Hosting the workshops has also encouraged me to put on proper clothes and make-up and not just live in ‘day-time pyjamas’!
.
Mindfulness meditation is a skill I learnt many years ago and it is incredibly effective at dealing with stress and panic at times like this. You don’t have to have to be a Buddhist or spiritual in any way. All you have to do is be still, find where your breath comes into the body and relax. When your attention wanders away, bring it back and perhaps make a mental note of where it has gone – worrying, planning, thinking. It is very much about living in the now, an acceptance of who and where you are in this very moment and not worrying about the future or thinking about the past. Do this for ten minutes and I think you will feel much calmer.

Join me on Zoom 10.30am and 7.00pm London Time for an hour of writing and meditation. Email me elaine@write-it-down.co.uk for the latest log-in details. You don’t have to share any of your writing, you can mute yourself and hide your video. No writing experience needed, just some paper, a pen and a sense of adventure!

My workshops are £20 for one hour and payable via PayPal or bank transfer

See what other writers say:

‘The sessions have been surprising, enlightening, entertaining, challenging. thoughtful, respectful and made me think about my motivations, experiences and what has made me who and what I am.’

 ‘Thanks again for such thought provoking and comfortable, well crafted sessions. They have been one of the most consistent things over the last year or more.’

 ‘Thanks again for this morning’s session. I felt emotional at the start and the only way I can describe it is like being hugged.’

 ‘I’m writing this straight from my first writing workshop with you and I want to let you know what a special hour this has been for me. I’ve been lurking in the shadows too long!’

 ‘Thank you so much for this morning. It was really good and provided some really valuable focus for writing and being able to get the words to flow onto the paper in a way that felt natural. I will definitely join in the future and am blocking out the space in my calendar right now.’

 ‘I really love how you guide the sessions and since I’ve been in my first session, I feel much more confident with my flaws and could start to break bad habits and blockades.’

Glowing Testimonials on our 2019 Writing Holidays

Just in case you’re still deliberating on whether Write It Down! writing, walking and meditation holidays at Finca Buenvino are RIGHT for you, are worth the money or the effort involved, whether you would fit in or be able to write [because you're not a 'writer']…may I suggest that you take a couple of minutes to read what our guests say about last year and then grab the last few spaces I have left?

I promise it will change your life. Many, many thanks to you wonderful women from all over the world who have contributed. Link to book:http://write-it-down.co.uk/booking-form

‘Absolutely wonderful programme of events. I liked how they unfolded and we ended up doing types of writing e.g poem, scary story, etc- things I never thought I could try. Felt challenged but in a really supportive environment and NOT having the schedule in advance made me relax much more. Thanks Elaine, you have made me feel so much better about writing. I was feeling stressed about it for so long and I feel so much happier. I loved the teaching and your energy and enthusiasm for life and for writing.’ Yasminah.

‘It feels like Elaine has given me a precious gift that will last a lifetime – the confidence to write and the understanding of how to write. Where I thought I had nothing to say, I now feel that my life is significant enough to write my memories and that I can do this for the rest of my life. I have found my voice and fell renewed and empowered.’ Siobhan.

‘Elaine’s dedication, her background and experience all meant she was an excellent facilitator and could get us all doing things and writing things we didn’t believe we were capable of. She was never pushy or patronising.’ Lesley

‘Elaine guides you skilfully as you discover your writing ‘voice’ – it’s a week of nurturing your self and your talent in a friendly, non-competitive and secure environment. You’ll certainly emerge from your time at Finca Buenvino feeling creatively energised and physically unwound.’ Lesley.

‘Elaine’s calm positive encouragement is infectious, she has an amazing ability to inspire and build confidence. The combination of beautiful, tranquil surroundings, a stunning property, relaxing meditations, hugely interesting walks and thoughtful and diverse writing sessions all serve to make this a truly inspiring experience. The infinity pooll, fabulous food and a sense of being totally spoilt.’ Sue.

‘The most perfect holiday. I have felt so looked after and nurtured. A life affirming combination of walking, meditation, writing and food in a beautiful house and location. Thank you, Elaine. Clearly so much love and thought and care has gone into this week.’ Kate.

‘What I didn’t expect from the retreat was how each day would be so thoughtfully crafted to include the importance of experiencing  what makes for a good life – delicious food, a beautiful room, good company, natural beauty, walking and swimming – and how feeling cared for and relaxed would unleash such creativity, reflection and a genuine opening up, all pouring out on the page through each writing exercise. Elaine has created the ideal writing environment in which to learn what it is to be a writer.’ Nitasha.

‘Elaine is a force of nature and a fantastic teacher – her enthusiasm and encouragement have been so helpful given I was feeling rather insecure about the whole writing thing. Once in a while, you have a holiday experience that you know will stay will stay with you for a very long time. Buenvino and Elaine’s retreats are a magical combination.’ Francesca

‘Thank you, Elaine for a most wonderful week. It’s truly given me a new outlook on writing – less forced, more fun – and I’ll bring with me warm memories spent with everyone in this magical place.’ Lisa

‘The retreat is excellent in so many ways. Elaine presents with care and knowledge and elicits extraordinary responses from the group. It sounds clichéd but I have grown and changed through participating. Highly recommended.’ Anne.

NB: I was brought up to ‘not be the centre of attention’, to not be ‘full of myself’, not boast, continuously reminded that ‘pride goes before a fall’ and ‘children should be see and not heard’ BUT if this post encourages you to discover the wonders of Buenvino and the therapeutic power of writing down your life and sharing your stories – so be it! All I ask is that you are fit enough to walk up and down steep paths in the Sierra and pack your sense of adventure. See you in Sevilla in the summer…

The Stories Our Clothes Can Tell

When I recently suggested on Instagram that I was charity-shopping this jacket, the response was immediate,

'Not the orange puffa!'

First spotted in the wilds of Cornwall in 2010, my Uniqlo men's orange puffa has been my soulmate for nigh on a decade. I even took it to Antigua in 2011, it gets cold on 'planes,  I'd just come out of a relationship and I needed its hug. It has featured in so many of my adventures online and was the epitome of a Comfort Blanket. Last year I used it as a pillow when I was camping at Port Eliot. Yes, I have replaced it with a longer, Nike version but also, my life has changed.

The psychological importance of clothing should never be underestimated. From the smell of your dad's sweater to the pulling power of a favourite 80s outfit, I venture to suggest that everything hanging in your wardrobe has stories to tell. Sorting through my stuff for moving is like re-reading old diaries. That Zara black trouser suit that I bought especially for  a wedding and now they don't talk to me anymore. Leopardskin ankle ankle boots given by an ex who 'wanted to buy me something to wear' and then sent me a picture of a whole rail of age-inappropriate Topshop purchases. I kept the boots. I have some of my children's Fiorucci and Nipper clothing, an Edwardian bustle skirt bought at a car boot sale in Brighton...without doubt, there is much that won't get worn again but it is a tangible part of my family history and the smells and touch evoke a myriad of memories.

When I buy something new, I have to make friends with it before I wear it. Stare at it in the wardrobe, like new Clarks leather school sandals sleeping in a tissue lined box in the corner of my childhood bedroom. I don't trust these new arrivals. They have an attitude that isn't mine and I have to understand it.

Age eventually flattened the puffa; the recommended machine washes were gentle but the down gradually disappeared and I had to help it out and  wear another jacket underneath to  keep  me warm. It tried its best but I watched it die. Ten years of love, ten years of adventures. A whole big, fat chapter of my life.

Change Is Good - Why I'm Moving To Spain

It’s usually the kids that go off travelling but this time, it’s the mother.

I’m selling-up in London and swanning off to Spain. Not to the Costa Packet with it’s plethora of cafés serving up Brit food to Leave voters, but the passionate heartland of Andalucia, Seville - where in summer, cafés pump out water vapour over the terraces to cool down the customers and dinnertime is nearly bedtime. If Europe won’t come to me, I will go to it.

Was I pushed or did I jump? Neither, sometimes everything falls into place and you know it’s time.  Are my friends and family in shock? No, to be honest, I’ve talked about moving from my bolt hole in Stoke Newington for so long that the majority of my friends are probably bored stupid with me harping on about it. But the options were always a return to Brighton or a walk on the wild side in St Leonards. Of course, like the rest of us, I’ve gazed in wonder at estate agents boards each time I visited my brother in the Lot-et-Garonne, ‘Only €50 for that enormous, run-down chateau!’ But France has never held my heart, despite their superior patisserie. I lived in Italy for four years in a previous incarnation and the southern European heat,  energy and delight in a boisterous public celebration of almost anything has always been much more my style.

My adult children would definitely benefit from more miles between us. I did fall in love and move to Cornwall 14 years ago but that didn’t work out and seems it wasn’t far enough. Since the death of my husband in 2000  we have lived in each other’s pockets far too much and now, single for five years, all my high days and holidays have been spent with my sons and daughter. I do realise how lucky I am and am eternally grateful but I need to let them go.  With no grandchildren, no partner and no pets, as I friend remarked, I am unfettered. To be honest, it sounds a bit too close to ‘unhinged’ but there may be some truth in that.

Is it crazy at the age of 70, with a history of heart disease, breast cancer, two hearing aids, two cataract ops and various gynae rearrangements to forsake the NHS, ditch my Freedom pass and live in a furnished rental, probably with no lift, in a city where I don’t speak the language? Ladies and gentlemen, may I draw your attention to bears in the woods…

But my E111 medical card will function until December 31st 2020 #allegedly and my phone has free roaming so what else does a woman need? Apart from manzanilla and the opportunity to learn flamenco?

Understandably, there’s maybe an element of wishful thinking in the responses of some of my friends. Later in life, a woman can more easily become a carer – for her partner, a parent or her grandchildren and I am, in many ways, in an enviable position. My work as a writer, workshop and retreat leader means I can operate anywhere there are English speakers so I’m writing lists, speaking to storage places and financial advisors and trying to persuade my kids to take temporary possession of the olive tree, the enormous coffee table and far too many books.

October Newsletter

Write It Down! Spain 2019 is over – Bring on 2020!

Afternoons are for dreaming and writing

It feels like Elaine has given me a precious gift that will last a lifetime – the confidence to write and the understanding of how to write. Where I thought I had nothing to say, I now feel that my life is significant enough to write my memories and that I can do this for the rest of my life. I have found my voice and feel renewed and empowered.’ Siobhan

‘The most perfect holiday. I have felt so looked after and nurtured. A life affirming combination of walking, meditation, writing and food in a beautiful house and location. Thank you, Elaine.’ Kate

We are thrilled to announce that we have been chosen by Guardian Travel as one of their TOP TEN LIFE-CHANGING RETREATS WORLDWIDE plus Finca Buenvino, our Andalucian farmhouse home, has been chosen as one of Alastair Sawday’s 25 Favourite Places To Stay in Europe.

Now October is here, and that means saying goodbye to Finca Buenvino for 2019. Thank you to Sam, Jeannie, Charlie and Jago Chesterton for being the very best hosts any writing group could ever wish for. This year has been wonderful – and as ever, we have shared lots of laughter, some tears and much, much brilliant writing.

BUT no need to fret! As we have confirmed dates for 2020. Booking has now started so, I know everyone says this, but I do advise you to book early to guarantee a place. Buenvino has five exquisite bedrooms, all with private bathrooms and glorious views, some available to share and groups are limited to seven guests to ensure that everyone gets the appropriate encouragement, nurturing and attention.

Here’s the link for more info: http://write-it-down.co.uk/spain 

2020 Dates

Saturday 20th – Saturday 27th June

Saturday 4th – Saturday 11th July

Saturday 5th – Saturday 11th September

Prices:
£1800 twin room

£2200 private room

Prices include all expenses, minus travel to/from Seville.

‘Once in a while, you have a holiday experience that you know will stay with you for a very long time. Buenvino and Elaine’s retreats are a magical combination.’ Francesca
‘Elaine’s calm, positive encouragement is infectious. The combination of beautiful, tranquil surroundings, a stunning property, relaxing meditations, hugely interesting walks and thoughtful and diverse writing sessions all serve to make this a truly inspiring experience.’ Sue

Hope to see you in Andalucia in 2020!

The Benefits of Being Alone

What living and travelling on my own has taught me

On the beach in Portugal as a participant in a Heal The Healers retreat in January 2019 - thanks to Casa Fuzetta

For the very first time in my life, I’m home alone.

After years of ‘boomeranging’ my adult sons have gone and a couple of months ago, my youngest moved out. She and her boyfriend got their own place, albeit only 30 minutes up the road. For 53 years I’ve cooked, washed, cleaned and looked after other people and absolutely loved it. It’s been noisy, chaotic, exhilarating, terrifying, challenging but almost always, very rewarding. I’ve been a lover, a mother and a carer and before that, I was a 17-year-old daughter living at home with two parents, three younger siblings – and a dog. Now the only beating heart in my home is my own and every room in my three-bed, two-bathroom flat is just for me.

I expected to feel lonely when everyone finally left and took most of their things. I expected to feel sad and yes, initially all the clichés of the ‘one pint of milk and a small, festering loaf of bread’, judgemental stares from the empty mega fridge-freezer, family-sized dishwasher and large-capacity washing machine were true. But bizarrely, I feel 30 years younger and ten feet taller.

The other night, stressing out about not falling asleep as quickly as I wanted, a voice whispered in my ear, ‘Your job is done.’  Freaked out, I changed track in my head and concentrated on my breath and hit back into the mindfulness meditation techniques on which I can always rely. The next morning I realised what that was all about. Yes, my job is done in so many ways. My three kids are happy in their own homes and achieving amazing things professionally, but finally being alone has shone a light on what I have achieved, especially in the last 20 years since my husband died. It has given me space to recognise my own strengths – holding the family together, supporting them emotionally (and sometimes financially) and using my experience and skills to start a new career that I love, empowering others by writing down my life and encouraging everyone to do the same.

Also, maybe I have relied too much, for too long on my children’s company. If ever there has been a film to see, an exhibition to visit, a new travel adventure to plan my first thought has always been, ‘Would Jamie, Will or Lu like to do that with me?’ I have been enormously lucky that a lot of the time, they have said yes. But, it’s time I finally let go and moved on. Found out who I really am and what I want to do for the next maybe 30 years of my life. And lately I’ve discovered that it IS possible to make fabulous new friends when you’re older, you just have to travel more on your own!

2019 lies ahead and I welcome it with open arms. I have no ailing parents to care for, no partner to accommodate, no grandchildren (yet), no health issues that I’m aware of, no car, no mortgage – and no dog. For the very first time in my life I have no dependants, apart from an ever-increasing army of spider plants. The only person I have to look after is myself. What I have always dreaded has turned out to be a true liberation.

            A recent report in the UK press stated that, according to the Resolution Foundation report, we are happiest in our lives at 16 and 70. That we are happier, more satisfied and feel a greater sense of self-worth in our earlier years – and again as we approach older age.

I’m 70 in September. Bring it on! 

The Power Of Nature To Heal

Photo of the Sierra De Aracena by Charlie Chesterton, chef at Finca Buenvino. Follow him on Instagram @foodsunandfun

I’m writing this in a café in north London, down wind from the peppery scent of their Christmas tree. Outside, the sky is blue and the sun shines.

I want to go and play outside, Mum!

Every year it’s the same – every year I’m crawling the walls by December, desperate for sun and fresh air, and yet the answer is in my own hands. Not more extra spending on a possibly-effective SAD light, but getting my butt moving; wrap up, shape up and get out of doors. And not to Savers, Sainsbury’s or another ‘indoors’ but really OUT, OUT.

Whatever the weather.

As a child I found such happiness spending whole days outside –looking after the cows on a near-by dairy farm, searching for shells on the beach, roaming the fields on the family allotment, deep in the Hampshire countryside. All places where I could escape into my imagination, undisturbed by my parents or siblings and find peace and happiness Now, I want a life more in walking boots and waterproofs and less in make-up and outfits socially acceptable for city-living. I want mud. I want to feel my heart race as I climb a hill or mountain and my spirits soar as I reach the summit and gasp at the landscape before me.

The power of the natural world to heal and inspire  is something I need to remember in the dark, indoors days of winter in the Northern hemisphere. Plus now there’s digital help at our fingertips. I’ve joined a Whatsapp group called ‘Nature Therapy Counsel’ which encourages the sharing of photos of the natural landscape. There’s  the website Spirit Of The Trees which ‘provides poetry, folk tales, myths for tree lovers’ and as I type, on my laptop  I have my headphones plugged into a Youtube tape of 11 Hours of  Tranquil Birdsong.

Author Matt Haig was quoted in the Guardian Review recently, in relation to his experience of depression, saying, ‘…the day I realised I was going to be OK was the April after my breakdown, the sun came out and I almost felt a literal weight being lifted.’  And I’ll will be OK too, when the higher light levels return. In May, I’m back in wooded landscape of  the Sierra De Aracena National Park in Andalucia to run writing retreats and there we’ll spend almost all day outside -  meditation sessions, writing workshops, guided walks and eating lunch and dinner – but in the meantime I must  take more advantage of London’s myriad of parks and wild spaces for my mental health, whatever the weather. ‘Tis verily the season for bringing the greenery in but I need to get out as well.

This poem by the American author and poet Wendell Berry is my Christmas gift to you:

‘When despair for the world grows in me 

and I wake in the night at the least sound

in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be, 

I go and lie down where the wood drake

rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds. 

I come into the peace of wild things

who do not tax their lives with forethought

of grief. I come into the presence of still water.

And I feel above me the day-blind stars

waiting with their light. For a time

I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.’

© Wendell Berry.  From “The Selected Poems of Wendell Berry”

New Women's Writing Workshop in London

Women’s Wednesday, Weekly, Writing for Wellbeing Workshop [trying saying that after a couple of glasses of red!]

“Elaine’s inspirational teaching touches many aspects of writing and uncovers many emotional layers - non-judgemental, sensitive, fun, very creative and caring.”

Every Wednesday morning, 10.30-12.00pm at The Last Crumb Cafe & Work Hub in Stoke Newington. No previous writing experience required, all writing is in a note book with a pen or pencil, no ‘wrong’ way to interpret any of the writing suggestions. This workshop is not about spelling, grammar, punctuation or publication but is an opportunity for all women to discover the therapeutic benefits of writing down their lives and sharing their stories in a small, supportive and un-judgemental environment. An opportunity to play with language and re-discover our creativity. The Last Crumb has great in-house baked pastries and cakes and of course, excellent coffee, tea and herbal drinks.

“The space is very cosy and intimate and the pastries etc were fab. It felt as if we were being really well looked after.”

To Book, please follow this link to Evenbrite: https://bit.ly/2zWHsd4

Autumn Celebration

A time to say thank you…

Sam Chesterton, owner of Finca Buenvino, arranging flowers for the drawing room

“Elaine, you are an inspirational teacher and I wish you could have been the course leader on my MA! You’ve encouraged us all with such sensitivity, perception, creativity and fun that I’ll always want to go on writing! Thank you for interconnecting with us all on a deep level and sharing your life and talents with us.”

We have had a wonderful year at Finca Buenvino in 2018 - filled with laughter, love, generosity and gratitude. We have met so many new writers and taken such great pleasure in sharing with them the superb hospitality and food of Sam, Jeannie and Charlie Chesterton - introducing them to the high hills of the Andalucian landscape, the joys of sharing mealtimes, guided walks, mindfulness meditation sessions and of course, the transformational power of writing down our lives in notebooks.

The infinity, salt-water pool which overlooks the Sierra De Aracena Y Picos De Aroche National Park. Finca Buenvino sits in 150 wooded acres which we explore every day, always taking time to sit and write sensory observations and stories in our small notebooks which we carry everywhere.

I will leave it up to comments from my writers on our September week to explain the benefits of a Write It Down! holiday at BV. Thanks to all of them and to everyone who has joined me during the last four years. We will be back here in May, June and September 2019.

“The teaching method’s were superb; constant gentle nudges that got you out of your comfort zone and made your heart and mind wake-up and produce writing that I didn’t know was there - non-judgemental, sensitive, fun, very creative and caring to us all. I would recommend this holiday to anyone interested in writing.’ Heather.”

“Elaine’s teaching created a very good team spirit, pushed us a little so we could all get a lot from the course but did so with humour throughout that was always encouraging. This holiday has finally got me started on a long held resolve to start writing - it was a very enjoyable, relaxing and therapeutic experience. David.”

The Orgasm Tree

Finca Buenvino amongst the sweet chestnuts. Photo by Jenni Bradbury.

Very often, we begin a conversation with a friend on one subject and progress rapidly to something completely different, discovering on the way the most illuminating information.

 This happened to me last week. I was describing the climate at Finca Buenvino in Andalucia, where we run our writing holidays. I explained that whatever the temperature in the summer months, we can always walk because of the shade of the cork oaks and sweet chestnut trees that cover the dehesa - the wooded landscape of the Sierra de Aracena National Park.

‘Oh!’ my friend exclaimed, ‘That’s why the atmosphere is so beneficial for writing and meditation up there! That’s why your writers find it so empowering to stay there. Sweet chestnut’s a well known Bach flower remedy for encouraging new beginnings, transformation into a new and much better life. It’s a treatment for the "dark night of the soul," the despair of those who feel they have reached the limit of their endurance, it’s for a time when old beliefs and patterns break apart and make room for new levels of consciousness. It is the perfect treatment for when you are ready to open up to the light at the end of the tunnel, the light before the new dawn.’ Buenvino certainly has a magical aire, everyone remarks upon this. When I told her that the flowers of the sweet chestnut purportedly smelt like semen, she laughed. ‘Ah yes, it’s known as the orgasm tree because it produces such a surge of transformative emotions!’

The trees blossom in June, we’re there from the 16 -23...do join us.

Why Spending Time and Money on Yourself is Essential

Often,  the responses I get from writers on my workshops or retreats are, ‘This feels such a treat, such an indulgence, having time to myself, being given permission to write.’

In these frantic, challenging and guilt-inducing times when we can feel powerless to affect the bigger picture, nurturing our bodies and feeding our minds is even more important. And writing it down, bearing witness, leaving a written record on paper for future generations to read, handle, hold and treasure is a duty. Not an indulgence, far, far from it. It replenishes our self-belief and self-esteem, as much as it informs and encourages others. Remember John Aubrey, the 'father of lifewriting' and his insistence of 'writing down the minutiae of life'. All our lives matter, not just those of celebrities, politicians or cultural heroes.

This is a piece that I wrote recently  for Alyson Walsh’s blog That’s Not My Age, for older women with style. I hope to meet many of you on my writing retreats in Spain at Finca Buenvino this summer, writing down your lives and enjoying a whole week of indulgence! 

I’m at my favourite hairdresser’s, in charity-shop top and jeans, spending a ridiculous amount on a cut and colour. The guaranteed boost to my fragile self-confidence will be well worth it. Tomorrow I will pay to have my toe nails painted, even though my bathroom needs re-grouting and the tap has a terrible drip. My saloneyebrow maintenance ritual is a non-negotiable expense, I love the therapist’s gentle attention. Last night I booked a three-week runaway to Crete in August, after weeping buckets at the Charmed Life in Greece free exhibition at the British Museum about the friendships between writer Patrick Leigh Fermor and artists John Craxton and Niko Ghika. God knows how I’ll pay for the care home now. What I once believed were indulgences have become essential mental maintenance.

My kitchen blind is held up with drawing pins and I really must paint my bedroom walls but tell me to invest in a new kitchen bin and I glaze over and buy another novel. I’ve been to the cinema more times in the past month than in the past year and my addiction to Eventbrite is causing concern. My membership of the Tate costs a bomb but visits are intellectually invigorating. So many places to go, people to see, lessons to learn.

Is it my age that is causing me to fast-track through life, sucking up sensual experiences, ignoring practical concerns? Is it the global political uncertainties? Fear of impending climate melt-down? Or is it the realisation, at 68, that it is not selfish to nurture myself? That feeding my brain, my creativity and my self-esteem may pay dividends in the fight against dementia, helps me in my work and in my relationships? Yes, I must attend to the mundane, pay the direct debits and remember to eat more fruit and veg but worrying about the what-ifs in five, 10 or 15 years hence seems a pointless exercise if I don’t cherish myself today.

The Power of Writing

Because I’m far too often attached to social media, because I sometimes have a rubbish diet, drink too much and exercise too little, because I live too much indoors on my own and not enough outdoors – especially at this time of year – my brain is often a muddled mess of incoherence with an inability to prioritise. But, writing it down is the only way I know how to sort it all out…

I don’t need a room of my own, the ‘right’ chair, desk, notebook, pen or  scented candle to achieve this.  I need room in my head; not in a house or flat or hotel. Years ago, I came to the blindingly obvious conclusion that I write best when I finally get ‘round to actually WRITING – on paper with a pen. Usually, I don’t evaluate my own writing, any attempt is good enough for me. I am like a hungry child chomping up white bread jam sandwiches, when I write down what’s inside my head.

The metaphor that sits most appropriately with me is, that when I write best I am like a wave surging over the horizon, crashing onto the shore, tossing forth pebbles, seaweed and dead fish. I am a wave that pulls you under but then, spits you out. I am the cold, angry seas of Cornwall that scare me rigid. I am the massive surf of Costa Rica that astounds, delights and entices. I am the clear waters of Greece that relax and revive. I see the birds that travel with me, dipping their wings in my dancing reflections. I see the birds that feed gratefully at my feet, the oystercatchers and curlews racing in my shallows. I am so much more powerful that I thought, so sure of who I am and why I’m here. When I have written it down.

But before I reach this place my stomach sinks, my eyes widen and my pen quickens, sliding and leaping across the page. It comes from my subconscious. From the feelings I had as a child on a beach in Hampshire, alone at the end of a day-trip, willing my parents to stay a little longer. All my life I have run away to the coast, maybe I should live there again – in Cadiz? In Palma? In Falmouth? In Hastings? Immediately I click on Skyscanner, on Rightmove. Is it possible? Can I do this in January? Can I do this alone?

Stop running, Elaine. It’s not the sea I need but more actual writing.  When I write I can conquer anyone, anything. I’m Boudicca, Cleopatra and Oprah rolled into one. I need to listen to my own advice, my own teaching that has empowered others on my workshops, holidays and retreats in Mallorca, Wales, Andalucia and London for more than six years…

Here’s some advice on how to start…

Brain dumping: The importance of free writing, the spill-out onto the page that relaxes you, frees your head, clears your brain. No worries about spelling, punctuation or grammar. As Anne Lamott describes in Bird By Bird, ‘The Shitty First Draft.’

Give yourself permission to write: In a notebook, any old notebook, on the bus, on the train, waiting for the Doc, the Dentist, kids to come out of school. Put that phone away and get out that pen. Even a one-liner is helpful.

The unpredictability of writing: Surprise yourself with what turns up on the page. Shock yourself now and then! You can always tear out that page and therapeutically burn it!

Personal writing is not being indulgent: We need creativity, imagination, flights of fancy, day dreaming in our lives and a rant on the page is far more constructive than a rant on Facebook.

Why Good Eating Makes Good Writing

Breakfast at Buenvino

Ever since my school home economics lessons when, to my utter amazement, I got an A for cookery in my senior school exams, I have felt strangely empowered in the kitchen. Now, in the hectic run up to Christmas, I indulge myself. I love the mechanics of baking; mince pies, spicy cakes and fruity puddings are hidden away in sealed containers, all over my apartment ready for the festive gatherings. The days have grown shorter, the nights colder and soup bubbles on the stove, lasagne tans in the oven and a wholemeal crust, spinach and goat’s cheese quiche sits cooling quietly on the work surface. All ready for the home coming of my family.

When I started my writing workshops and holidays for Write It Down! six years ago, I immediately decided that providing nourishment and delight for the ‘corpo umano’ – by treating my writers to the very best food and drink – would be as important as feeding their hearts, souls and brains with creative and therapeutic writing  exercises.

Cooking has always been my form of therapy – whether it is for myself or for others. As soon as I put on my striped blue and white cotton apron, with numerous stains and one string  ‘temporarily’ pinned on with a safety-pin, my blood pressure normalises, my shoulders relax and I am back in my childhood kitchen in Basingstoke. Despite a less than perfect relationship with my mother, I fondly remember her home cooked dinners [had at lunch time] of vegetables from our garden and meat from my grandfather’s shop. With gravy, always with gravy. Good food, cooked with care and attention and served with pride is a silent expression of love.

In London, I make cakes every week for my Mums, Babies and Bumps Creative WritingWorkshops. In Spain, at Finca Buenvino for my writing, meditation and walking holidays, Jeannie Chesterton and her son Charlie cook up a storm in their Andalucian farmhouse kitchen. They also run cookery coursesthere and have published a fantastic cookbook filled with their own recipes – beautifully illustrated with photographs by my friend Tim Clinch – so we are privileged indeed to share their table.  And share we do, all of our meals, eating outside in the spring and summer, under the wisteria in the kitchen courtyard watching nut hatches, tree creepers and geckos or in the candle-lit Moroccan courtyard where, as we eat, we hear owls calling, watch the small, black bats flying high between the cork oaks and see the sun dipping over the Sierra De Aracena, flooding the sky with an astounding pink and purple hue which I have never witnessed anywhere else in the world.

Sharing food, taking time to taste and relish what we’re eating, talk about what we’re eating, listening to each others life stories and not having to worry about the washing up when we leave the table is bliss and it bonds us closer together as writers, sharing our journey, planning fresh adventures, forging new friendships and discovering new strengths and directions in our work.

It has been so important to me to find somewhere to run my retreats that has the same ethos about eating and enjoying food and cooking that I have, and that I try to bring to my own home and family. When we write, we must use all of our senses. We note the scents, the sounds, the touch, the sights, the tastes – in a setting, in a dramatic episode imagined or in a memory retrieved from our past.

Holidays should be a time to embrace the good things in life – in summer and in winter. We give ourselves a hard time enough during the year, juggling so many aspects of our lives. Snacks and meals are snatched hurriedly between work and other fundamental obligations. We stand, we perch, we rush from A to B. We grab the Pepto Bismol and always mean to write, to meditate, to go for a walk in the countryside and learn how to breathe again.

My aim with Write It Down! workshops and holidays is to give you that space, to give you that time and to feed you well. Only then, can you relax and truly write down your life…

Music & Dancing

Last night I went to Ronnie Scott’s Jazz Club in Soho with my 28-year-old daughter, 40 years after I was a Saturday-night regular with her father and got down to James Brown. Gone are the days of smoke filled rooms but the atmosphere was just as sultry and seductive. On Mother’s Day this weekend, my three kids are taking me to a hip local eatery where, ‘our Sunday resident DJ will be playing all the Motown/Soul/Disco classics that’ll get your mum on her feet’. Like I need encouragement.

I fell in love in the 60s to the growly vocals of John Lee Hooker and Robert Johnson and gave birth to my first child accompanied by a mix-tape of Al Green and Bill Withers. Four years later, it was Prince’s Purple Rain that greeted my second son and after another four years, my daughter arrived to The Gypsy Kings. From my early years in ballet classes, learning the mesmerising steps of the tarantella and mazurka, music and dancing have fortified my life - and every live gig  is a shot of adrenaline far more life enhancing than a vegan lifestyle or statins. My memory of dancing alone on a beach in Costa Rica, plugged into my iPod while my man of the moment tried to stand up on a surf board way out on the waves, is an moment for me that symbolises freedom, happiness and how to be truly alive.  Weddings, parties, friends ‘round for dinner - any excuse and I’m up on the floor.  Even my weekly meditation class has movement, a gentle two-step sway to accompany the preparatory chanting. I hate gyms and am never going to do a marathon but the 15 minutes of disco dancing that I do every morning in the privacy of my own apartment keeps me fit, fills me with utter joy and puts a smile on my face all day.

And this is why I’m taking my digital music library and my Bluetooth portable speaker on my writing retreats in Spain this year; so we can all have the opportunity if the music moves us, to dance with the sun on our faces and our hearts full of  celebration for simply being alive.